Needing help with confidence and life direction?

By Carol Pocklington

Confidence is a learnt behavior. Everyone can be confident. It may be outwardly different as each person is uniquely different, but in essence you can be confident.

Somehow over the years women, in particular, see the powerful, centre stage woman as confident and may well be inspired to be her or even feel intimidated by her.

Let’s be clear about one thing – the greatest, genuinely powerful, confident women are always willing to hold out a hand to another woman. They carry their authority lightly and want to see every woman they connect with be all she can be.

Confident woman have influence. They have a clear direction of where their life is going. Yes, there will be twists and turns, but they have a framework that sets the clear direction of their life.

They make thoughtful decisions. They’re not double minded. When a complex issue is faced, they seek wise counsel before making their decision. And as an aside, confident women, or those wishing to be more confident, have a mentor. A trusted person with whom they can bounce ideas off. This person is likely to be a little further along in the life game. Do you have one? If not, I thoroughly recommend you to prayerfully find such a woman.

In my role I often hear conversations where opinions and viewpoints change frequently. This happens especially when the ‘boss’ or another in authority is in the room. Have a clear opinion about issues. Always be open to new thoughts and suggestions that might inform your viewpoint. But seriously, don’t be a people pleaser and agree with a conversation that you truly haven’t formed any real insightful opinion about. Too harsh? I hope not.

Other women will be drawn to you for advice and friendship as they see you are trustworthy, a woman with thoughtful opinions and confident in her life direction.

Now don’t misunderstand the loud and proud woman as necessarily having the confidence and experience -they may well have, but many reserved, thoughtful woman are just as confident, but rarely push their head above the parapet.

In finishing, women who have a clear sense of direction and a confidence in who they are won’t be found in the middle of a gossip fest. In fact, they are more likely to intervene and call a halt to the gossip or even correct some wrong thinking. This kind of women demonstrates integrity and is worthy of praise.

So, if you are reading this and thinking that you are lacking in confidence and perhaps even don’t have a clear sense of your life direction, I urge you to find a trustworthy mentor and also find some really good books to read.

Also, consider using a scientifically based personality profiler and take a deep dive into getting to know yourself and where your strengths and limitations are. The outcomes will surprise you but will also begin the process of helping you build your confidence and setting your compass in the best direction for your life.

Self-confident[a] know-it-all’s will prove to be fools.
But when you lean on the wisdom from above,
you will have a way to escape the troubles of your own making.
Proverbs 28:26 The Passion Translation


This article first appeared on Christian Woman & Co, supporting Christian women in business and mompreneurs.

Carol Pocklington is a Human Performance Accelerator. She has worked with Hugh Massie since 2001 as the DNA Behavior concept was conceived. She works with people and businesses worldwide. Her real-world application of behavioural insights, gives her the capability to serve as a business strategist, coach, mentor, and trainer. She is also a prolific blogger, a public speaker and author, specializing in human behavioural insights.