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Unexpected mothering moments, the good, the bad and the ugly; it is these moments that undoubtedly add the spice to the recipe that is motherhood. As a mother of 3 young children and host mother to a teenager, it’s not hard to recall (often in slow motion), those moments that have made it to what I call ‘The Mothering Hall of Fame’.
Let’s start with the ugly. I call this ‘The Perfect Mom Incident’. We all know her. She’s that woman in our world who has it all under control! She’s calm, she’s clean, she carries perfectly chopped, healthy snacks in Tupperware containers. During our gathering, there I was engaged in conversation with ‘The Perfect Mom’ trying, of course, to be as impressive as possible, and doing a fine job of it, I might add. All of a sudden, out of nowhere, my daughter turned a perfect shade of goblin green and promptly vomited into ‘The Perfect Mom’s’ handbag. Thankfully, the perfect mum gave the perfect response, “don’t worry, I needed a new handbag, wallet and phone anyway”. Why me?
It’s easy to get stuck in the ‘why me’ trap, believe me I know. “Why me?” I exclaimed when my son broke out from head to toe in chicken pox only ten minutes before my sister’s wedding! “Why me? Hang on, why not me?” I corrected myself as I kissed him on the forehead, tucked him under my arm and marched him to the church in my 9 inch heels! “Keep Calm and stay flexible”, has become the mantra of my mothering career.
Without the bad and the ugly, how would we moms ever appreciate the sweet as much as we do? The freshly picked flower from the garden, the soft kiss on the cheek, the loud ‘I love you’ in the checkout line never fail to warm the very cockles of my heart. A moment of clarity reminds me that God has persevered through my ugly moments. As God is inside of me, I can press on and persevere though my own wee little one’s best efforts to see what stuff I’m made of.
It was only a few days ago when I stood in the waves at the beach and asked God the seemingly impossible question, “How can I see past the discouragement and be able to cherish the small moments?” I paused for a moment and looked up into the heavens and to my surprise saw two people dangling off parachutes. In the capturing picture, I felt my Daddy God whisper, “Look from my perspective, you and me together kiddo.” Filled with a fresh hope I knew that a heavenly perspective was just what I needed. The ability to look from a new position, even during the daily dramas of motherhood!
By Kathleen Vergers | Freelance writer in VIC Australia